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23 August 2011 @ 11:24 am
Fic: Be Real  
Title: Be Real
Pairing: River Song/Amy Pond
Other Characters: Rory Williams
Rating: NC-17
Summary: The fourth time River came to Amy, it wasn't exactly planned.

River stumbled in the door once Amy answered, smelling strongly of electrical fire, metal, and that strange tang in the back of her throat that Amy had learnt to identify as simply time. Her body language was that of exhaustion; her eyes were nearly hidden by what looked for all the world like twin bruises.


"Hello, sweetie." The greeting lacked its usual warmth.

Rory came down the stairs, his football shirt on, ready for the game at the pub. He stopped short at the sight. "Melody...?"

"Hello, Dad," said River, in a monotone that unsettled all of them. "It's been a very long month."

"You were just here two days ago taking Amy on a trip," said Rory, confused.

"Time is funny like that." River didn't seem to have the heart to banter, even.

Amy pulled River into her arms. "I'm so glad you came to us. We'll take care of you."

"I'll call the guys and tell them tonight's off," said Rory, patting his pockets to find his cell phone.

"Don't change your plans for me," said River.

"No, dear, go on. I have a feeling all she needs is a shower and a freshly made bed right now." Amy gently walked River away from the door, still holding her close.

"Could kill for it," said River. "Did, or I'd still be out there."

"Despite what you may think, sir, I can operate sheets," said Amy. "See you in the morning."

Rory smiled. "Hopefully I'll see you both." He kissed Amy as usual, then pecked River on the cheek. "I'll make breakfast if you stay."

"You drive a hard bargain," said River, smiling slightly. "I'll think about it."

He picked up his keys from the foyer table. "I'm off."

"Have fun, darling!" said Amy as he left, locking the door behind him.

"You said something about a shower," said River, still monotone.

"Or a bath, whatever you'd like. Just tell me. But let's get upstairs." Amy settled herself at River's side and began to guide her up to the second floor.

River sighed. "I'm sorry for walking in on you like this. But I needed..." She trailed off.

"Whatever you need, if I can provide it you know I will," said Amy. She was becoming rather frightened of what had happened, because River just seemed so dead and unlike herself.

"A shower sounds like heaven," said River as they stepped onto the landing.

"Then come in our room, the water pressure's better," said Amy, leading her to the right door.

River kept following, trying to ignore everything but the wonderful feeling of Amy's skin next to hers, filthy though it was at the moment.

Amy stopped at the bathroom door and turned River to face her. "What happened?"

"Spoilers." Stripped of its usual playful tone, the word sounded ten times as horrible as it normally did.

Amy gently tipped River's face up so she could see her. She noticed that the usually expressive green eyes were hollow and sad. She kissed River softly, almost as an inquiry.

River sighed in response, her body losing just a slight amount of stiffness.

"Yes, I'll fix this," said Amy. "Let's get you clean."

In the shower, Amy took it upon herself to scrub all the soot and assorted grime off her lover's body, playfully smacking River's hands away when she tried to help. "Just let me take care of you!"

"I should be taking care of you," River pointed out.

"You usually do. But stop being afraid to let go and let me."

River sighed and let Amy wash her hair for her. It felt very good to let her do that much, at least.

Once River was clean enough to Amy's liking, they wrapped up in towels and went out to sit on the master bed.

"I'll make up the spare bed for you in a while," said Amy.

"Why not now?" River tried infusing her usual playfulness into her tone. She hoped it worked.

"I'm busy just at this second," said Amy, leaning in to kiss her.

River was tired. No, she was exhausted. What she had just seen, just fought...she couldn't even play it back in her head. She just wanted it to be over, and then her sweet, beautiful Amy was kissing her, so gently, as if afraid she might shatter underneath her. River sighed and laid back on the bed, pulling Amy with her.

"Please tell me, River." Amy didn't like the anguish she saw etched on her lover's face. "If I don't know what's wrong, how can I fix it?"

"I don't need fixing."

"I need to fix you." Amy kissed her again, still tender and worried.

"I just want you here, now, warm and alive and next to me, sweetie," said River softly. If I can't feel you, I'm afraid you'll slip away...

Amy nodded, then rose up to climb fully onto the bed and made herself comfortable, the towel dropped off the side of the bed, one arm stretched out invitingly.

River unwrapped herself slowly, then curled into the space Amy had made for her. Thank you, my love...

Amy sank her free hand into River's hair, then resumed kissing her lovingly, hoping that it was clear she would do whatever River wanted, be whoever River needed her to be, if only it would help.

River slipped her arm around Amy's waist and let herself be loved. The lips she adored and longed for whenever she stopped running long enough to think were still the same, a fixed sensory point in River's unfortunately topsy-turvy, wibbly-wobbly existence. She could hold on to this, Amy's lips, Amy's skin, Amy's love...as long as she still had Amy, she would be okay. Amy never changed her face or her personality. She just was, and River counted herself bloody lucky she had even this much.

Amy was concerned that River was retreating into her own mind as her responses grew shallower, but she wasn't ready to go anywhere else without River asking her to. She pulled River closer, wishing she had telepathic ability so she could say, simply, "Please don't leave."

River came back to herself then, and realized she was being ridiculous--no time to dream about Amy when she's right there, after all. She parted her lips and pressed briefly at Amy's with her tongue, asking to be let in. Amy fit her lips to River's, allowing her in, still gentle and patient. River opened her eyes briefly to see that Amy's were closed, eyelashes fluttering sweetly with each unconscious blink. She sighed again, this time happily, and shut her eyes to give back the trust she was receiving.

Amy held River tightly, willing her to forget, relax, just be. I wish you'd tell me what hurts you, dear love. It struck Amy that whatever it was, could very well be in her future, and perhaps River wasn't telling her for a reason... She gasped and broke away.

"Amy?" River sounded fragile, completely unlike herself.

"Sorry, forgot to breathe...I'm just so happy that you're back," stammered Amy, pulling River against her firmly.

"Didn't realize you liked me that much," said River, trying to be playful and flirty. She settled against Amy's bosom, hearing the comforting heartbeat. Just one. And it'll stay the same. She began to trace Gallifreyan words across Amy's back, a love poem she'd read at some point and actually remembered.

"Having me on," said Amy, rubbing River's tense back muscles gently. "Why wouldn't I like my River?"

"I like that I'm still yours."

"Always will be, too."

"I'd love to believe it, dear."

"Fine archaeologist you are if you know nothing about us Scots. We're stubborn as hell."

"Aha, that's where I get it from."

"I don't particularly feel like letting you go any time soon."

River shivered, she couldn't help it. "Promise me."

"I promise I won't let you go. But, River...why can't you say?"

"Can't be told. Has to be lived." River shivered again, and Amy tightened her embrace.

"Are you cold? It's a bit cold in here, I know."

"Just a ruse to cuddle, really," said River, lying through her teeth.

Amy laughed softly. "Just ask, love. Just ask for what you want."

"I have what I want, right here." River kissed the hollow of Amy's throat gently, flicking her tongue lightly against the soft skin. "Just don't go anywhere."

"Didn't plan to," said Amy, as both River's words and actions sent shivers down her spine and gooseflesh rose on her arms. "I'm here, my love. I'm here."

River began to slowly kiss down Amy's torso, making sure their skin touched in as many places as possible.

Amy loosened her hold to allow River to move. "I love you, River."

"As I love you, Amy."

Amy sighed softly, letting her fingertips drag on River's back as she moved. What is it about her that makes it all feel so much better?

River rolled Amy to her back gently and resettled between her legs, still kissing down her stomach.

Amy smiled, although she knew River couldn't see it. "I thought you were tired."

"Exhausted. But..." I need to convince myself that we're real. That you are real, my sweet Amy.

Amy laughed again. "I'm just teasing."

"You'll regret that..." River managed to make that just as dirty as she wanted it to be. She took a long, slow first taste of what she'd been missing desperately for a month.

Amy moaned softly, her hands reaching down to wind in River's hair. "Will I really?"

River's only response was to start up a rhythm that she knew would wind Amy up, but was too slow to let her finish.

"God, you're much too good at that," Amy hissed through clenched teeth, since she knew she was incapable of regular speech. "Who taught you, anyway?"

River paused. "Let's just say you're the doctoral thesis."

"Oooh, I see," Amy managed to gasp out before River resumed what she was doing. And you're damn good, too.

River absolutely loved the way Amy tasted. It was made even better by the fact that River could savour time through her. She loved that best, out of any sexual experience ever (and she'd had countless, no use denying it). When she knew her lover wasn't linear; that time flowed through them and around them, and she could find it written into every pore of their skin. Amy's time-lure was incredibly strong due to all that had happened to her throughout her life, and River fancied she could almost intoxicate herself with it, if she just did everything so right that Amy's body would sing...

Amy let her conscious mind go the higher she got. River was the best she'd ever had, and certainly would ever have. Not that she was unsatisfied with Rory, really, but River was beyond boundaries, beyond good sense and reason and yet she was right, this was so right that it couldn't be wrong, damn the consequences and what was that thought again? "God, River, how do you do that..."

River laughed inwardly. Being selfish comes naturally, my love. "I just listen for what you like."

Amy whimpered. "Don't stop!"

"Don't ask questions, then." River slipped her fingers inside Amy, and it was all the redhead could do to not arch up into a full backbend. River waited til Amy's body came back down, then put her tongue back to better uses than talking.

Amy liked that response. It sounded like her River again, not the broken time-traveller who'd appeared at her door. But then River pushed inside her, and coherent thought left Amy's head completely.

River could tell that Amy was close, so very close, and maybe if she was just right with her timing, Amy would scream as she came, the sound that River loved to hear. It meant that she won. Won what, she wasn't sure, but she cherished every victory.

Amy always struggled to hang on until the very last second. In her opinion, it made letting go that much more intense. Unfortunately, River had learned her body far too well, and knew how to smash the last vestiges of Amy's control over herself. Amy found her breath, and in the next second the waves came crashing down, sudden and shocking. Amy meant to exhale, but the shriek ripped from her throat and she swore she'd yanked half of River's hair out, but the waves kept rolling, her hips kept thrusting, and River was still there, riding the gentle spiral down with her.

When Amy's body finally stilled and her hands relaxed, River came up to kiss her tenderly. Amy sighed happily and wrapped her arms around River's waist, making the older woman lie down on top of her. "Thank you, my love."

"For what?" Amy was perplexed.

"For letting me love you." River buried her face in Amy's shoulder.

"Any time, dear. Any time." Amy wasn't sure she liked River's tone, but decided ignoring it for now was a good idea. "May I return the favour?"

"Mm. Maybe later. I just wanted you." River nuzzled into Amy's neck. Just you, as you are.

Amy managed a kiss to River's temple as best she could. "Are you feeling better?"

"Oh, yes."

Rory smiled at the sight in the spare room. Amy was curled protectively around River, who'd clearly forgotten about the tear tracks down her cheeks before she slept. They were both dressed against the slight chill of the house in Amy's winter pajamas, the far-too-long sleeves almost completely covering her hands. Rory covered them with the duvet and tucked it in around the edges. He hoped Amy had gotten River to open up while he was gone. He never wanted to see her like that ever again.
swan_secretsswan_secrets on August 24th, 2011 06:33 am (UTC)

I'm still planning on writing more Amy/River, it's just a matter of hitting on the right idea...